dwelling

i have had a lot of time to dwell here the last, what week, on things of interest to me. though some thoughts were consuming so much so that it was effecting my outward appearances and attitude, ii have had a chance to hash out some of the things bothering me. overall it has helped me to get back to almost normal. but, i still can not get over the original thoughts that were plaguing me to begin with. the only relief i get is when actively working and i don't have time to think. any down time what so ever though fixes that. i guess i need to wrap this up real quick because i need to go to bed. in the most basic and simplistic viewpoint i could come up with to explain my current internal conflict without too much details would be this:
my id is calling for me to forgive and forget and move on in a direction that would make both parties happy. my superego on the other hand can not let me forget those trespasses against me per say and tells me i should move on. my poor ego on the other hand is stuck in between these two and has yet to find a balance that is much needed. well in a way i guess you could say it has. and right now i'm trying to please my ego and follow the path it believes i should take. but the other two sides, particularly one, is trying it's hardest to win out. thank you freud for your input.

kurtis @ 1:29am